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Buzzed
Aug 22, 2005 5:29:55 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 22, 2005 5:29:55 GMT
Amy's life had been strange ever since she had returned to MH. Her friends had grown up around her. They made her feel like a lost little girl. Someone in need of their guidance. They had gone on with their lives, gotten jobs, made themselves something to be proud of. And Amy was stuck in the past.
Always had been. With her, it had always been all about the past. The year that she had been gone was spent brooding over everything, thinking about the tough things, life's mysteries, love, miracles, religion, all while holed up in an empty house with no one to talk to but the early morning breeze. The only reason she had come back was because she thought she had been going crazy. She felt broken, like the dead bird that had been in her window box, and doomed. Such a strong word, doom, that she had always tried to ignore, to laugh at, to shrug away.
"You're always in the past, Ames.."
Amy was more then a little buzzed. She stared sullenly at the empty mug in front of her and the glass of water next to it. That was her trick, had been since her grandfather had died and she had wanted to drink it all away. Take a glass of water with every pint and the pain wouldn't be as bad in the morning.
At just the thought of the headache that lay ahead of her, Amy groaned and rested her chin on her arms that were folded sloppily on the table before her. Amy was never a happy person when she drank. She was more the brooding type, the why-is-everything-so-screwed-for-me type. The kind that everyone could relate to in their darkest hour, that sad songs and poems and paintings were inspired by.
And poor Amy was no different than any other drunk in the room...Just there to drink their problems away, to try and forget the things that were waiting home, to lose themselves in the bottom of an empty bottle. Rosmerta stared sadly at Amy from across the bar, always that stare, that pity that Amy hated, despised. She buried her face in her hands as Romerta came over, informed her that she couldn't have anymore, just water and asprin if she needed it.
Amy just nodded, waved her away. She had done this before, it was always the same. Drink what's bad for you, drink too much, cut off, drink what's good for you, go home, sleep in, and maybe do it again the next night if nothing else came up. She hated the way she lived, her routine. But she couldn't stop it. Everyone had gone on. And Amy was still just the little school girl who was barely scraping by.
ooc: Open to all.
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 22, 2005 6:23:46 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 22, 2005 6:23:46 GMT
ooc: well if it's open to all...
bic: The night breezes whipped through the mostly deserted streets of Hogsmeade; sending chills through all that had the misfortune to feel them. The coldness that they carried with them was nothing compared to how the wind seemed to steal away one's happiness and joy. One minute; one could be cheerfully leaving the Three Broomsticks as warm and happy as they could be, but the wind swirled and rushed about them; stealing it away. And yet the wind only stole when there was something to take; if one had nothing, the wind would not affect one in any way.
A lone figure walked through this streets despite the wind, for now; the person had nothing left to be taken. On the outside; this person always was bursting with cheerfulness and warmth, but a simple talk in the Entrance Hall had changed that. His thoughts had changed from merriment and joy; plummeting into darkness and despair. As the figure neared the door of the Three Broomsticks, one final gust of wind tried to unnerve the person, but it only succeeded in freezing the skin.
Skin was something that could be remade and healed, but what the wind did affect; the mind, took much longer than that. The door slowly opened and in stepped a boy that was 6' tall and clearly was a student at Magical Horizons. What distinguished him from other people at the school was his hair and his eyes. The boy's hair was grey, something that one would only expect to obtain with age, and yet this boy was only 15. The young man's eyes were green-grey, a shade that many did not have and was something that always drew the eye of passersby.
As the boy took a seat that was near a girl, presumably another student from Magic Horizons or perhaps an alumni, the boy's attire could be seen clearly. He wore a yellow and black-stripped t-shirt, black pants, and sandals. The peculiar attire of the boy did not attribute at all to what the mood of the boy though. The mood of the boy was not reflected through his clothing, but through his eyes.
If one were to look through the eyes of Forgoil Halifirien at this time; they would see so many emotions fluttering through them, but the most visible ones were confusion and a sense of loss. The last time that Forgoil had entered the Entrance Hall, his painful past was brought up once more, and with that came other memories; like when he was in the graveyard and Kaiser told Forgoil that he was only searching with false hopes when Forgoil had found that tombstone with his last name on it. Kaiser reminded him that it was not his name, but a name that Forgoil made up for himself and that he would never find his past. What he wanted to find out the most about; he thought would make his existence complete; he was told that he would never be able to find it.
That was why Forgoil Halifirien was at the Three Broomsticks that night. Not for a drink to drown his grief, but to merely escape those that might worry for him if they saw him acting this way. This plight belonged to Forgoil, but he knew that his friends would try and help no matter what; that was why he left their company. The downcast boy cast a flicker of a glance at the girl that he saw when he first sat down, and it seemed that she too was in pain over something. The boy thought it would be wise to see what was wrong, but a voice inside told him that if what he thought was true, then it would be best to leave her alone because that is what the boy wanted, so perhaps she would want the same.
But it looked as if she was affected more than he was. He only had mental scars as proof of his pains and losses, but she seemed to suffer much more than he did or ever would. Not heeding the little voice in the back of his head, Forgoil moved a bit closer to the girl, and whispered while looking away from her, "It seems that you have missed a ship that has long set out for the sea. I am right in guessing this, Miss?"
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Buzzed
Aug 22, 2005 19:06:16 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 22, 2005 19:06:16 GMT
"It seems that you have missed a ship that has long set out for the sea. I am right in guessing this, Miss?"
Amy heard the whisper clearly, and it shook her somewhat. She had been lost in thought, in self-pity, and was suddenly woken from that. She waited until the room around her swam back into focus and rolled her head over slightly on her arms to look at the young man sitting next to her.
Studying his features, she could automatically tell something was wrong. He had been hurt, as had she, and he was here to get away from it as well. She smirked slightly and tucked a lock of frosty blue hair behind her ear before speaking.
"You are quite right, Sir." She let her eyes fall back down to the table and rolled her head back over again, twirling the straw in her water glass with her thin, pale fingers. "My ship has long since passed."
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 22, 2005 19:53:35 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 22, 2005 19:53:35 GMT
Forgoil continued to avert his gaze, but he slowly turned to face the girl once she acknowledged his presence. The expression on her face seemed to be a mirror of the one that the boy had; only this time Forgoil had no intentions of letting his feelings out.
He was known to be quite emotional and once he started was hard for the boy stop himself. But now Forgoil was resolved not to cry, especially since the matter that troubled him was so personal and so delicate. As he looked on the girl, he noticed that she reminded him of one of his friends, but the similarities ended with the blue hair.
Brushing some of his grey hair out of his face, Forgoil said, "Well you are lucky Miss; in time you may find this ship of yours. My ship has long been lost with all hands; leaving me shipwrecked on the island of Now. The ship of my past is gone. I have nothing left. Nothing at all, but you; you may find this ghost ship of yours and things might be different for you."
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Buzzed
Aug 22, 2005 20:32:04 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 22, 2005 20:32:04 GMT
Amy sat up straighter and turned to face him, surprised at the sadness of his words. She saw that his eyes reflected a strong feeling of loss that anyone could see if they took the time to look at him. Amy stared at him a moment longer before shaking her head, turning away, and replying.
"I know that you do not want to share your story; I can see it in your eyes. So I will not ask you to. Strangers in bars are not the best people to receive your darkest secrets. But I do not know what could possibly be so horrible, what could have happened to you, to make you so melancholy that you would feel compelled to say those words." Amy turned back to him, leaning against the cushion behind her. Her head tilted slightly, she continued on, talking to herself as well as to him.
"What could have happened to you to make you lose all hope? Because if my life has taught me one thing, it is that hope is all we have to hold on to. The small inkling that things will get better, that there's always someone there to hear you and tell you it's alright, that is what keeps us going...Human nature, really. And to lose that is..." She blinked rapidly, and leaned against the table again, searching for the right words.
"Just completely extraordinary to me."
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 22, 2005 21:16:10 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 22, 2005 21:16:10 GMT
"Perhaps you are right, but then again perhaps I should explain a bit more before you can draw any conclusions. In my lifetime, I have always found that the past was an important part of who we are, but this is affects me terribly. It is from the past that one can turn to find out who they are and what they are. This is something that I cannot truly experience. I can't find even the slightest clue as to what my past was. Hence my ship has sunk", explained Forgoil.
"And yet when I try and find out more about that ship; something always keeps me from finding it or someone tells me that it is pointless to continue my search. I don't feel complete without knowing my past; I mean, there are somethings that I know but those things are trivial compared to what I want to know. My name...it isn't even the name that my parents gave me. It is of my own creation", said the grey-haired boy.
"But you don't even know my name nor I yours.", said Forgoil, "My name is Forgoil Halifirien. May I have the pleasure of knowing yours?"
Even as these words left the boy's mouth, the young man felt that before the end; this girl would know much more about his plight and perhaps he would know more of hers. And now the green-grey eyes of Forgoil looked calmer now that he was starting to talk, but his insides still felt like they were being tortured for holding back his emotions
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Buzzed
Aug 23, 2005 0:08:52 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 23, 2005 0:08:52 GMT
Amy listened intently, leaning her chin in her hands as he spoke.
"Well, that does sound like a good excuse to feel down. I would have never found myself if I hadn't known my past...I also have no idea what it feels like to be so in the dark on such matters, so I suppose sympathy is the wrong word to say. But then, so is pity." She smiled sadly and continued. "Your story sounds quite interesting though. And seeing as how I may not remember you in the morning at all, feel free to tell it. Was it some sort of amnesia that caused you to forget? Or just a spell? I've never heard of such a strong case of memory loss that couldn't be reversed in some way or another."
When he told her his name, she smiled a bit wider. "Well, it's very nice to meet you Mr. Halifirien. I'm Amethyst Stevens, but everyone calls me Amy. May I buy you something to drink?"
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 23, 2005 1:30:12 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 23, 2005 1:30:12 GMT
"It's a pleasure to meet you Miss Stevens", said Forgoil with a smile, "And thank you for offering, but I am fine and need nothing to drink as of now. Perhaps later I will take up your generous offer."
Letting out a small sigh, Forgoil let his head hang a bit and the smile that shown on his face slowly faded away. It seemed that he had a lot of explaining to do for Amy; she seemed to think that he had lost his memory in some incident, but that wasn't the case. He remember all of his life, expect his first two years; the years that he lived with his real family, with a real name, and was a real child.
But now Forgoil Halifirien was something that existed and yet didn't. He wasn't named Forgoil by his parents; and if he had he never would know for certain. They died when he was two and after being sent to an orphanage for most of his life; the grey-haired boy didn't even know if he had biological family out there. They never looked for him; they never aided him in times of need; to the boy they never existed. And yet he wished they did so that he could find out more about himself.
"If you want to listen to my story; then you are welcome to", said the young man, "But Miss Stevens; the listener will also have to be listened to. If you understand what I said, do you consent of this?"
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Buzzed
Aug 23, 2005 2:29:02 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 23, 2005 2:29:02 GMT
Amy lifted the glass of water to her lips and took a quick drink, before setting it down again and turning to nod at her companion.
"Of course. If I understand correctly, you would like a story in return for a story. That can most definately be arranged."
She smiled and nodded again, reclining in her booth and crossing her legs under the round wooden table in front of her.
"Most definately."
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 23, 2005 3:10:17 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 23, 2005 3:10:17 GMT
Despite the state of despair that haunted the green-grey eyes of Forgoil, his eyes started to give of a new light; one that always appeared when he was telling a story or reciting literature. Forgoil then nodded and said, "Your understanding is correct Miss Stevens. And now for the tale so that you can better understand my plight."
"When I first came into this world, I didn't know much nor do I remember much as many people tend to do. All that I can remember was the feeling of happiness was all around me where ever I went. But that feeling was robbed from me when I was sent to the local orphanage at the age of two, or so I was told when I was old enough to understand.", explained Forgoil, but his voice seemed to get softer with what came next, "I...I always thought that something had happened to them...that they never would leave me there without a reason. For 6 years of my life, I always thought that they would return; that they would come back for me, but they never did."
"Do you know what it is like to be left alone in the dark?". asked Forgoil, "If you do; then you must know what it is like to experience such loneliness and helplessness. If not, then I am afraid that you will never experience feelings like these at that kind of potency. The mind of a child works differently from that of an adult and the two things that it that affect it the most are fear and abandonment. I changed as a child when I heard that my parents had died before they ever brought me here; that the attendants had been lying to me, but when I asked if there were others that might come; they never answered me."
"That is what I so dearly search for; are there members of my family that still exist? I know nothing about them, so as far as I know you could be a cousin of mine or something like that. I have searched for them for as long as I can remember; first through my dreams as a child, and then through books as of now. But nothing helps me get closer to what I search for; nothing seems to spare me this pain", said Forgoil as he looked Amy in the eye, "But I think that concludes the first part of my saga. Perhaps now we can hear some of yours, Miss Stevens?"
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Buzzed
Aug 23, 2005 3:34:21 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 23, 2005 3:34:21 GMT
Amy fidgeted in her chair a bit, trying to get comfortable. Settling on crossing her arms against her chest, she turned back to Forgoil, any trace of her smile gone.
"It seems that I was right in assuming you have gone through a terrible ordeal, my friend. And as a reward for your story, for I know it took a lot of strength to tell, I shall share mine in a nutshell."
Amy took a deep breath before continuing. "My parents died when I was three, just a year older then you were. Still to this day the details of their death are fuzzy, and I have given up somewhat on ever finding out what happened to them. All that I do know I acted on and the man responsible is dead as well. But I was left alone, with my twin sister who despised me even at that young age and my grandfather who was never quite the same after his daughter passed on. We moved around too much, and as my sister and I grew we hated each other more, and were alike less. She turned into what one can call a 'Wild Child', doing things she shouldn't have done that ruined her life forever. My grandfather couldn't take it anymore, and she was sent away to a distant relative on his father's side who lived in Russia at the time."
"From then on, it was just me, my grandfather, and a dear childhood friend. And the year I turned sixteen, that friend was brutally attacked and killed. Scared and very much alone, I started to follow in my sister's footsteps, until my grandfather decided that it was time we moved back to England and that I attend school here at MH. When I arrived here I was apprehensive and distant, but I eventually made new friends and pushed my past into a distant part of my mind. I felt renewed, and for the first time in my entire life, truly happy."
"But then another blow struck me, something I could barely handle. My grandfather's death. His death is also a mystery, though the coroner said it was an undiagnosed poison. After he died, I was..." Amy paused to search for the right word and to blink back her tears. "Broken, somewhat. I drifted away from my friends, no matter how much they tried to help me back to the light. His funeral was horrendous, because my sister came and we did nothing but argue about assests and his fourtune. His will settled that though, it was all left to me. In a fit of rage, my sister actually had the nerve to spit on his grave. At the time I was so overwhelmed that I didn't even care, but now that I look back on it, I see that it helped to deepen my hatred for her."
"And so I left MH, with nothing but a suitcase and a scrapbook my friends had put together for me, and I went to stay in my grandfather's house so that I could sort out everything, inform my family, and deal with my grief. It was so difficult, though. My pain was just...unimaginable. I was going insane in that house on the hill, all alone. No one ever wrote. No one came to see me. I was just so...alone."
She smiled somewhat, and turned to look at the table in front of her. "I couldn't take it anymore. So I came back, to find my friends had moved on and were dealing with their lives in a mature manner I could never manage. Last night I received a nasty letter from my sister and here I am, drinking again. And that, Forgoil, is my story."
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 24, 2005 18:04:14 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 24, 2005 18:04:14 GMT
Forgoil keep a calm exterior, but inside his mind was frantically trying to piece things together. Here he was; trying to find the remnants of his early childhood, but his predicament was dwarfed by that of Amy's. She had been alive when the person that she cared for the most in her surviving family died. He couldn't even ponder what she went through when she went back and tried to figure out everything. And she had been alone for all that time; bordering on insanity, or so she said.
What a fool he was; to even think for a minute that he had suffered at all compared to what Amy must have gone through. But then again as he thought on it; it seemed that Amy and himself had exactly the opposite problem. The first 14 years of Forgoil's life and been mostly miserable and he was alone; no family or friends until he went to Magic Horizons. And no he was searching for the one bit of history that he thought would make his life complete, and yet he could never find it.
Amy life's had started off nicely; until her parents died; until her twin changed; until both a close friend and her grandfather lay cold in the grave. And then Amy had spent some long amount of time in her grandfather's house; on the verge of insanity because she was all alone. Well, perhaps Amy and himself weren't exact opposites, but they need share one thing; they both knew what it was like to be alone without the hope of seeing anyone ever again.
But that loss of hope must of passed for both of them, for here they were in Hogsmeade Village. Forgoil's eyes seemed as if they belonged to someone much older; one who had seen more in their lifetime than the grey-haired boy had, but Forgoil had seen enough. As had Amy.
"Magic Horizons...", said Forgoil silently; almost to himself, "Now that I think on it; many of the people that I have met here seem to have problems just like ours. I wonder why that is; surely you would think that only a few students would have such problems, but it seems that the entire school is like that. I wonder why that is..."
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Buzzed
Aug 24, 2005 19:19:09 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 24, 2005 19:19:09 GMT
Amy shrugged and took another quick gulp of her water.
"I've studied enough Divination to know that there are some paranormal things out there that seem to affect people, way beyond magic. There are forces that seem to bring people together who share simliar backgrounds, usually tragic ones, so that they can help each other with what has gone wrong in their lives. For instance, there was a story on some news show five years back or so that talked about a young woman who had been orphaned at an early age, who got on a bus a just happened to meet her grandfather. Things happen that couldn't have happened without a little help."
Amy then cocked a small grin, tapping her nose slightly. "Then again, we all may well be full of sh*t."
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Forgoil Halifirien
New Member
Hufflepuff Student
Pain is to Pleasure as suffering is to Love
Posts: 958
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Buzzed
Aug 25, 2005 19:21:20 GMT
Post by Forgoil Halifirien on Aug 25, 2005 19:21:20 GMT
Were there uncontrollable forces out there that manipulated man in their own ways; sometimes bringing pain and agony and other times giving respite and joy. Did such external forces exist in this world? If so, then there wasn't much out there to make Forgoil believe in them. After he had first ran away from the orphanage, he had lived a life of poverty and loneliness. So if there were forces out there that worked in ways unseen, why had they never helped him?
The grey-haired boy quirked an eyebrow at Amy's blunt remark, but it was the kind of thing that was useful in changing the mood of a depressing topic. Letting out a little laugh, Forgoil replied while smiling, "Perhaps you are right, Amy. But I for one am not full of sh*t; I am full of manure, thank you very much."
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Buzzed
Aug 25, 2005 19:46:07 GMT
Post by amy on Aug 25, 2005 19:46:07 GMT
It was the first time Amy had snorted loudly in a long time. She grinned and shook her head, staring at her now-empty water glass.
"Hmm, an interesting mental picture, Forgoil. You seem to be functioning rather well for being filled with such stuff. Kudos."
She grinned and leaned her head on her palm, watching him.
"You're really a very interesting person. That's a good thing, don't worry, just not very common now-a-days. It's been a very long time since I last met someone like you."
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