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Post by claira on Jul 1, 2005 23:08:41 GMT
OOC: Graphic, read at your own risk...
BIC: Claira walked into the owlery hoping that there was a letter awaiting her. Indeed there was, a white owl, flew straight into a window, and knocked itself out. Claira looked at the poor owl, trying not to make herself sad, she shrugged and then approached the owl, snatching the letter adressed to her out of its feet/claws.
Claira walked over to a corner, and started to rip at the envelope. Guilt over-powered her, and she had to help the owl. She walked back over to it, and gently picked it up, and placed it on the window-cell inside. She examined it, to see if it was injured, but it wasn't. It let out a little breath, which let Claira finally return to her letter-reading.
She finished pealing open the letter, to find a three-page letter, which had smudges all over it, from what looked like to be water or something. The letter read:
Dear Claire, I have missed you so dearly, and some tragic events have happened. It is my job to report them to you, which I am sorry I have to do. The first thing is, your sister.
Claira gulped, as tears wanted to spill out.
Your sister- she didn't make it. I am so sorry for your loss, she died during the surgery. Before she went to get the surgery done, she told me that she loved you, and that she was sorry for what had happened between you two before you left. Your father, well he has ran away, basically he went insane. He destroyed your mothers grave, and he killed all of your pets.
Now for the final news, my father has bot been found guilty for the charges I pressed. I have been forced to live with him, and he is still doing the things he did to me- but worse. My mother doesn't even believe me, and I have gone on Crack again. I regret it majorly, I have ruined my life, and you are not here to comfort me. I have failed you, and myself. Everywhere I look there is pain and anger, and the world is never going to change. My life is not worth it, I am not worth anything, and I want to die. The only thing that ever kept me going is you, now you are gone. No one is going to miss me, I always thought- except for you. Now you are gone, and probably making so many more friends, and we won't be friends any longer, since you will have to live at MH even through your breaks, now that you have no family. So I have decided that it is no longer a sefish act, and I will kill myself tonight, when my parents are out getting drunk.
Brittany- your old friend, I love you.
Claira re-read the letter several times, she just could not take it in all at once. She took a deep breath, and faced the facts.
"They are all gone." Claira said a loud, as she stared at the letter.
Clairas pixie, flew up, and attempted to give her a hug.
"Thanks." Claira said quietly.
'Why do these things have to happen all the time?' she wondered to herself as she hid all her emotion.
She took off her wrist band, seeing the deep scars. She remembered the time that her lst friend left, that was now gone Brittany, had decided they would kill themselves together. Her sister had walked in on them, and they were taken to the hospital by the ambulance. Claira and Brittany rode in the ambulance as they laughed, "Damn, she caught us." they would say, because life had know real meaning to them.
Claira looked down at the letter and laughed in disbelief, her heart was filling with pain, bringing her down with it.
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Anna Tomlin
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Gryffindor Student
we can't lose, we just... can't.
Posts: 335
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Post by Anna Tomlin on Jul 23, 2005 15:38:25 GMT
Anna walked into the owlery to look for her owl, Ningo. But he was nowhere to be found. Instead, she found someone reading a letter and then looking at her wrist, afraid of what she was about to incounter. "Hello?" she said quietly, "Are you okay?" she asked the girl sitting there. Anna walked over to her slowly, hoping nothing bad would happen.
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Dante Rose Black
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Slytherin Student
Goodnight love I'll see you when my eyes open
Posts: 645
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Post by Dante Rose Black on Jul 26, 2005 7:52:39 GMT
Dante had followed Anna to the owlery, hopeing to ask her a question on their history of magic homework, but ran right into her as she had stopped and Dante had not noticed. She looked over Anna's shoulder to see a girl stareing at her wrist. Suddenly memories of her past flooded her, and she hoped with every prayer she could think of this girl was not about to do what it appered. Suddenly Anna spoke, thats good stop her. Dante thought. Better let Anna do the talking I'm no good with words.
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Post by claira on Jul 31, 2005 18:42:38 GMT
Claira saw the two other girls enter the room. "OH, uh, hi."
Claira took her letter, and folded it in half, then put it away in her pocket. Quietly she picked up her wrist band, and slid it back on.
"Yeah I am fine, that will be my last letter, that is all." Claira said with a smile on her face, she seemed like a crazy person, acting like this instead of crying.
Walking towards the window where the owl lay, she turned around, "SHould I jump from this window, or that one?" she asked, looking at the other window.
"That one is a bit higher up, I will go there." Claira stood on the window sell, and drew a couple deep breaths, then looked back.
"Do you want to watch, it shall be great fun for me."
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Anna Tomlin
New Member
Gryffindor Student
we can't lose, we just... can't.
Posts: 335
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Post by Anna Tomlin on Aug 1, 2005 14:24:26 GMT
"NO!" Anna cried. "Why would you want to do that?!? You have a whole life ahead of you!" She told this girl, although she didn't know her, she didn't want to watch someone kill herself either! "Please, get down." She said a bit quieter. "Don't jump..." Anna didn't want to be reminded of what happened to her own sister. She could feel tears about to fall, but she turned away and blinked them away.
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Post by claira on Aug 1, 2005 19:21:51 GMT
Claira sat down, her legs hanging out of the opened window, she smiled back at the girl.
"I might have days go through, but there is no way in hell that I have got a 'life' ahead of me. My life has been torn into pieces..." Claira said, "I want to do this, it is one thing that will make me happy."
Seeing the girl turn away, she wondered what was wrong, "Are you OK?" she asked, feeling bad for the girl.
Jumping down from the window sell, she smiled at both of them, "By the way I am Claira... I can do that later." Claira said looking at the window, "But for now what is wrong with you?"
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Anna Tomlin
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Gryffindor Student
we can't lose, we just... can't.
Posts: 335
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Post by Anna Tomlin on Aug 2, 2005 19:26:16 GMT
Still turned away, Anna replied, "I'm sure your life isn't as bad as you say it is..." although, she was probably wrong... that's what everyone said about her's. "Did you know that 75% of people that attempt suicide, wish they actually never did it... and sometimes... they end up dying anyway?" she smiled weakly, "One of those people... I knew, almost too well." she could feel tears in her eyes, and she wiped them away, "My sister. Twin sister to be exact. She killed herself, almost two years ago..." Anna said quietly. "I don't want to witness another death..." she confessed.
"By the way," she said and looked back to Claira, "I'm Anna, Anna Tomlin." She wiped her eyes and her cheeks where tears managed to fall with her sleeve. Anna brushed a few strands of hair out of her blue-grey eyes and looked around the room. Then, she touched her forearm, "And, I don't want to be reminded of my own stupid mistakes..." she whispered, but loud enough for Claira to hear.
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Dante Rose Black
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Slytherin Student
Goodnight love I'll see you when my eyes open
Posts: 645
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Post by Dante Rose Black on Aug 6, 2005 4:27:59 GMT
"Oh I'm Dante, I just w-was asking Um Anna for, it you scared me... I thought you I .... never mind...I-I should be going." Dante turned to leave, her posture betraying her, as she was leaving. She stoped and took a deep breath. "I life, no matter how meaningless it may seem at the moment will have a pupose, you only have to find what that is." She looked back at the girls with a smile and turned to leave.
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Anna Tomlin
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Gryffindor Student
we can't lose, we just... can't.
Posts: 335
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Post by Anna Tomlin on Aug 6, 2005 17:49:39 GMT
Anna turned to Dante, "No, you don't have to leave." She smiled weakly. "It's fine..." Anna responded. "I haven't for over three or four years... so, I'm back to normal... only once or twice i've actually..." she trailed off. "Anyway, Claira, Dante, let's, uhm... get out of here... maybe go down to the Great Hall and get a bite to eat..." She suggested and smiled at both of the girls. "Yeah?" She asked, hoping they'd say yes as well...
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Post by claira on Aug 7, 2005 2:06:24 GMT
Claira looked at the girl, almost as if she was insane, wasn't it supposed to be wonderful to see some end their pain? But then again, she thought I am different, I want to die, I really do not see a point, and she lost someone that she cared for... no one cares for me... so it is different.
"I am sorry about your sister, it must have been terrible. My life is not as terrible as a lot of people, but it has know point to it; and if I die, no one will mind, they will not even notice." Claira shrugged, "Everyone was wiped out of my life, and now my best friend is going to kill herself, once she is gone, there is no point at all. That is all, I have no one... but some people have worse, I guess." Claira said, handing the girl the letter, "Other things have happened-" Claira gulped down a set of tears, "But I could get over them, not this."
Claira slowly started to cry, "It is not fair, it won't get better, I just want to leave, that is all. You don't have to watch, you are welcome to go."
When the girl introduced herself, as Anna, Claira forced a smile, "I was Claira." Next the girl whispered something about not wanting to be reminded of her own mistakes, she looked into her eyes, with her own swollen ones, seeing a reflection of herself, giving the other girl a hug, "But you and I have a difference... You are strong."
Claira looked at the girl who said she was Dante, "I know, that is how it seems doesn't it? That is what I thought for the longest time... but then I realized that people die young, when they hadn't experienced what life might have held for them, so I know that not all lives have a purpose." Claira stood up, and went to sit on the windowsell.
Claira smiled at Anna, "You are a kind girl, both of you, but no I think I will stay. You two run a long, forget about me, like all the others..."
Closing her eyes that were shedding tears, she wiped them, sniffleing quietly, "I am pathetic." she said, "One thing, my pixie Blue-Drop, I would like you to give her to my friend Aira, she is from Slytherin, some how will you do that for me. The rest of my things, I wish to go to homeless children."
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Anna Tomlin
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we can't lose, we just... can't.
Posts: 335
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Post by Anna Tomlin on Aug 7, 2005 15:57:23 GMT
Anna looked at Claira, and then she spoke.
*I'm sorry to hear about your sister. It must have been terrible...* "Yeah. It was..." Anna responded, "But, now since I know you... I would notice if you died. And, I am sorry to hear about your friend... I only hope someone could have helped her." Anna said and took the letter that Claira handed to her. She read through it, a couple times and looked back up at Claira. "Oh... I am so sorry..." she trailed off. "That is all so, terrible" Anna replied, as Claira started to cry.
She walked over to Claira, and put her arm around her, "I know how you feel... about my sister, she told me before she did it, and I tried to stop her..." she started, "But it was probably nothing compared to this." Claira said something about Anna being strong. "Yes... I was strong because my dad got me help, because he noticed the scars... and it actually helped me..." she explained. "You might want to try?" she asked Claira.
As she heard her response of not wanting to leave she answered, "No, I think I will stay. And if you do go through with it... I won't forget you. I swear." Then, Claira told her that she wanted her pixie to go to her friend Aira, and for all of her other things to go to the homeless... "But, maybe... you won't have to give your stuff away. Maybe we can just, not stay up in here... and go down to the lake, or something... somewhere where you can stop thinking about this letter, maybe for just one second..." Anna requested.
"...And I know, that probably won't happen, because... it is very hard... to stop thinking about something like that," she finished.
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Dante Rose Black
New Member
Slytherin Student
Goodnight love I'll see you when my eyes open
Posts: 645
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Post by Dante Rose Black on Aug 8, 2005 8:29:01 GMT
"You know if you gave us a chance you would have new friends and as painful as it would be to get past the pain but it will end, dieing isn't really all its choked up to be... believe me." She also walked to stand next to Claira. and smiled. "So really, do come down with us, just today just give it a try, for us, for yourself, for the friend in that letter..."
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Post by claira on Aug 14, 2005 18:59:30 GMT
Claira looked up at the two girls, forcing another smile, but inside she knew that two girls who barely knew her, would not be affected if she were to be gone, inside she wanted to leave, and she knew it wouldn't get better; and if any of this was not true, she knew one thing for sure, she did not want to care about anything anymore, because in the end, it just hurts you.
Claira stood up, "I am tired, I guess I could go to the lake, and have a rest. However I know that there is no theropy in the world that will cure me, I am broken, and my soul is beyond repair, I don't know how you have been fixed," Claira said looking at Anna, "But I know I will never be fixed."
"There is only one thing I can do to make me feel OK, and it would be to save my friend, but she is probably all ready gone." Claira said quietly, as if she was loosing her voice.
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Anna Tomlin
New Member
Gryffindor Student
we can't lose, we just... can't.
Posts: 335
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Post by Anna Tomlin on Aug 15, 2005 1:04:01 GMT
Anna truly didn't want this girl to die. She listend to her carefully and responded, "Well. Maybe... I don't know. Maybe there's some way you could call her, or something... just to see if she's still there. And, maybe she could listen to how upset you are... and rethink her future actions. Why don't you use a phone and call her house... just in case..." Anna trailed off. She gave Claira a weak smile. "And if that doesn't do anything... well, I just want to let you know, that I have been trying to help anyone I could in situations like this." Anna continued, "And I really don't want to have someone die, when I know that I could've helped them. And I'd have this guilty consiouce..." Anna finished.
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Post by claira on Aug 15, 2005 2:48:06 GMT
Claira looked at Anna, "Do we have phones here? I would love to try and get ahold of her."
Claira just nodded at what Anna said next, closing her eyes, "It is just so hard." she said quietly.
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